Story Envy

Yesterday I finished reading “Garden City” by John Mark Comer. The book is packed with wisdom about work, rest, and what it means to be human, both now and into eternity. As I was finishing up the book, a section about envy caught my attention. I don’t think of myself as a particularly envious person, but this spoke to my perfectionistic heart. Basically, no matter how hard you try, there will always be someone better than you. No matter how intelligent, good looking or talented you are, “there will always be somebody who is smarter, better looking, more gifted, more successful, wealthier, or who has more Twitter followers or flatter abs,” Comer writes. There’s a fine line between wanting to be the best you can be and wanting to be someone else. And, admittedly, it’s a line I cross pretty frequently. According to Comer, the problem with envy is that “rather than enjoying who you are and what you do and the life that’s spread out in front of you, you covet someone else’s story.” Sometimes I think about how much easier life would be without my current physical limitations and I covet the healthy, functioning bodies of those around me. Or I’ll see an extrovert in action at a party or some other event and think, ‘What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I be more social? ‘

Thing is, those are the stories God has written for other people. He has a story just as unique and meaningful written for me. Instead of wishing I were more like someone else, I should work on continuing to develop into the person God made me to be. Part of that story is this blog. Another part of that story is God’s call to take communication to the next level at River West Church. This month I was promoted to Director of Communication at River West and it’s a job God has been equipping me to do for years. Even though I know that’s true, there’s a part of me that thinks this is all a fluke. Like I’ve got them fooled and one wrong move will spell the end of my career in church communication overnight. That’s the enemy talking. God is saying, ‘This is the story I have for you. Trust in me and I will give you all you need to write the next chapter.’